Why Every Couple Needs a Good Therapist
A happy marriage isn’t just about getting along day after day, spending quality time together and remembering to say your ‘I love you’s.
Marriages are not things that can be put on cruise control. If neglected and left to nature, your marriage can turn into something quite different – a sea of resentment, confusion and a real lack of communication and intentionality.
How can you prevent the occasional relationship blow-up, or even an eventual break-up? By seeking out counseling early on, which will give you the tools to help you cope with the relational hardships that come your way.
A MARRIAGE COUNSELOR POINTS OUT THE OBVIOUS
Many problems can be discussed and overcome with the right method of communication.
Just as you would stay on top of your physical health by going to your annual physical check-up and dentist visit, visiting a marriage counselor is equally important for your relationship health.
When we fall in love, we don’t consider what challenges will come our way. Often, we also forget to consider that our partner is a human being like ourselves who has weirdnesses, issues, and bad habits.
For example, how could we possibly know that five years down the line we may become workaholics and accidentally ignore our partner’s needs and grow apart rather than together?
This is the beauty of preventive marriage counseling. Not only will a counselor help each spouse to see various patterns of behavior and ways each person communicates to the other, but solutions for a long lasting and healthy marriage to come.
WE COULD ALL USE HELP COMMUNICATING
No matter how good we may be at communicating how we feel in a gentle and unaccusatory way, each of us has characteristics of our being that we can work on. Unless you’re perfect, or somehow managed not to catch the “bug” of reality that everyone else since the dawn of man caught. In that case, you should be in a museum.
One of the biggest benefits of a good marriage counselor is in his/her ability to dissect how each spouse communicates to the other.
What you may perceive as talking kindly to your wife, the counselor may see as talking with a blaming tone. You may not feel as loved by your wife as you used to, while she’s unaware that since the birth of your baby, she hasn’t been paying as much attention to your needs. Even the best couples need help learning various ways to communicate to one another, and although it can be challenging to move past hardships in your relationship, there’s also a silver lining.
Improving how you speak and act to one another helps your relationship to evolve into something even better that it once was.
BECAUSE YOU WANT YOUR RELATIONSHIP TO GET BETTER
Most of the time, couples seek out a counselor when they’ve hit a major hurdle in their relationship, snapped it, and fell on their faces; and not a moment before.
They may feel like they don’t have an hour each week to devote to their marital issues, or have the attitude of ‘why go to a counselor when everything is fine with us?’ Marriage counseling helps to manage feelings of disconnectedness.
Has your daily routine with one another consisted of watching TV and barely catching up on the other’s day for longer than you care to remember? While every marriage goes through periods of disconnection, many additional issues can manifest when you don’t take the time to address what each person’s real feelings are.
As each marriage is unique, so is each spouse’s position in it, which is why a counselor can be so beneficial.
YOU WILL NEVER BE THE SAME AGAIN
Your marriage will never stay the same (therapy or not), but with a qualified marriage counselor, you can help it to get even better than it ever was.
One of the biggest lies in the world is that marriage gets lamer with time! It is possible to have a marriage that develops positively with time.
It takes hard work, but nothing is more fulfilling than really connecting and growing with a spouse!